Monday, August 29, 2005

THE END: WvW Screeches to a Stop as Embattled Editor Found Demented in Office.

The editor and founder of Webcartoonist vs Webcartoonist, the mysterious figure known as WvW, was found in a questionable state of insanity in his non-existent office today. This prompted shocked rumors that the controversial scandalsheet figurehead had commited mental suicide.

He was found next to a half-empty bottle of schmoose pills, gibbering about whether "a comic that looks like a comic, walks like a comic and quacks like a comic is a comic."

"We think he overdosed on them." said one of the remaining reporters in hushed tones. "He was taking Freud on the side too. I think he was getting disconnected from everything and started saying stuff like "Can anybody stop this thing before my head explodes and my ears start to ring..."

"But I really didn't think he'd do something like that!"

Others however, said that they had already foreseen the impending fall.

"Yeah he was going around muttering 'We've been living life inside a bubble' or something like that." admitted another reporter, who shrugged. "We all thought he was just being philosophical but Regneva (the reporter who left because of the Harry Potter thing) did say before that things were getting a bit crazy."

However, there are suspicions of foul play. A half-torn memo was found on his desk. While the internet police have been reluctant to comment, it is suspected that the memo had been used to write a suicide note.

"None of us knew who he really was." Admitted another reporter. "He guarded his identity very jealously."

"Can we keep going?" he said when asked about Webcartoonist vs Webcartoonist's future. "I don't know. It feels wrong to. The least we should do is wait and see if a trip to the asylum cures him or something."

Contributor Mister Bristol was contacted for comment, but no usable quote could be attained through the sobbing. Some distinguishable words included "sorrow", "like a sibling," and, strangely, "donut."

Conspiracy theorists have pointed out it's just too convenient the note was torn where it would have revealed WvW's real identity. However, until the scrap is found, the real identity of WvW will forever remain a mystery.